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Follow-Up Discussion: Exercise Clothes in Nice Restaurants?

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Hello dear readers,

Today's video is a follow-up discussion on last week's post, Exercise Clothes in Nice Restaurants? I had a feeling this post would spark a passionate debate among readers, but I had no idea how passionate it would be! I have received hundreds of comments on the blog, YouTube channel, facebook and email from people passionately for or against the subject. The majority of readers agree that standards of dress in our society have fallen steeply. And as is indicative in the comment section, people all around the world are noticing that people are no longer dressing appropriately for nice dinners, outings to the theatre and even weddings.

I do hope you watch this week's video, which follows up on the discussion and includes the ideas that we must dress for the occasion, what Madame Chic would think of all of this, ideas on how you can cover up your exercise clothes if desired, and a few of my favorite comments from the week. If you are unable to see the video above, click here, look in the sidebar of this blog, or visit my channel: www.youtube.com/TheDailyConnoisseur Don't forget to subscribe to my YouTube channel as I will be uploading many bonus videos with the launch of my new book and the holiday season upon us.

News
This video is being posted early because on Tuesday you will see me again for the launch of Polish Your Poise with Madame Chic. I can't wait!

I will be speaking and signing books at Pages Bookstore in Manhattan Beach, this Thursday, October 29th at 7pm. I hope to see you there. I will be signing additional books for Pages to sell after the event, if you'd like a signed copy. Please give them a call at 310-318-0900 to reserve your signed copy.

Comments of the Week

There literally could have been over a hundred "comments of the week" because so many of you imparted such valuable advice. It was really hard to choose! Here are a few of my favorites:

Mary Grace writes:

Hello Jennifer,

LOVE this discussion -- it's nice to know I'm not the only one who's tired of exercise clothes everywhere that they don't belong. I am seventeen, and as you have probably observed, my generation really seems to wear only sportswear. I've been a fan of your books for a long while now, and, when I read your first book, I felt such freedom in knowing that yes indeed I'm allowed to wear my favorite, glamorous, pink, frilly skirt to the grocery store (contrary to what everyone says)!

I don't know if adults experience this, but as a teenager, people judge me by my "overdressed" appearance. Many people automatically think me (or anyone else dressed up) snobbish or without any depth of character because I have put effort into my appearance. They berate us for evaluating them at the face value in their very casual clothing, saying we judge them by appearance, but do the exact same thing to us! It's a strange world, isn't it?


Mary Grace, I am so relieved to meet a seventeen-year-old with such a great head on her shoulders. Keep up the great work!


Valerie D writes:

Jennifer I agree with everything you have stated here. I work in law enforcement and I honestly can't believe how people show up to the courthouse to go before the judge. Honestly it is so disrespectful. PJs, slippers, pants hanging down so their underpants show. It has gotten so bad the judge throws them out of the courtroom along with a speech on respect. What happened to common sense and respect?

Valerie, thank you for giving us a glimpse into your world. Good for the judge!


Sweet Bean writes:

My piano instructor is Japanese and was born and raised in Japan. She has such elegant poise and presentation in everything she does. When she would tell me stories of Japan, she would always describe details such as how the flowers blossomed in the spring, or more relatedly, how even a small trip to a convenience store would result in thoughtful hair and dress. She said going out in your pjs or work out clothes was non-existent.

It's about mindful living. It's about loving yourself enough to demonstrate it to yourself by sitting up straight (which is soooo healthy for you) by caring for your hair, giving attention to your body, and respecting your self enough to mindfully decorate that "window" into who you are, that is, your image.


Sweet Bean, your piano teacher sounds wonderful. It's great that you have such a poised role model in your life!


Sheila on facebook writes:

In the US people spend so much money on clothes then don't dress appropriately! Crazy!!

Sheila your comment made me laugh! I do notice that many people spend a lot of money on clothes they never wear. It is very bizarre!


Jacqueline T writes:

Hi Jennifer, this is such a HUGE issue I see everyday! I work in a major theatre in London's West End and the number of people who come to see the show in their sneakers, leggings and even Ugg boots (it happens more than I care to mention) is horrifying to me. Just the other day a Japanese lady came in wearing a full kimono ensemble and I had to comment on it because she looked so beautiful for the occasion and she was even sitting in the cheap seats. It really doesn't take much effort to look presentable and it lifts the occasion when you do. Xx Jacqueline

Hi Jacqueline, I chose your comment to discuss in this week's video. As a former theatre major myself, I do think it is inappropriate when I see people showing up to the theatre in flip-flops and cut off shorts because I know how much time and effort goes into each production. Thanks for sharing your perspective.

pammienakh shared a quote:

" My mother taught me that one's presentation is an expression of how much one cares about one's self and those around us" ~Attributed to actress Lupita Nyong'o~

I love Lupita Nyong'o. She has such poise and style. Thank you for sharing this quote.


Caley K writes:

While silently soldiering on in our determination to set an example for grace and elegance in our deteriorating society is always the classy thing to do, it is still important to recognize that we need people who will politely and respectfully speak up on this sort of subject. Although being a example of the change we want to see in our society does help, it sometimes is not enough and things must be explicitly stated. Sometimes all it takes is this sort of dialogue to cause an "Ah-ha!" moment for someone who might not have recognized these patterns in their own behaviour had it not been for someone else's observation and opinion on this trend in modern society. I speak from experience on this, and am grateful to Jennifer for helping me have that "Ah-ha!" moment several years ago. Thank you, Jennifer, for continuing to be an example in a public way that allows us to have a discourse on this sort of subject. I admire that even when you address "controversial" subjects like this, you are always able to do so in a polite, respectful, and civil manner.

Caley, thank you for your support. I do believe this subject needs to be spoken about. I am vested in being a living example, but I also believe that we all have the right to speak out about aspects of our society that disturb us. If I don't blog about it, no one will!


Lillian writes:

I get so much flack for my opinion about this, but I completely agree. I feel as though my opinion is always met with the notion that I'm being elitist by saying people should dress up for things, but it really doesn't have anything to do with money. I'm a graduate student on a very low budget, and somehow that does not relegate me to sweatpants. In fact, the nicer skirts, blouses, and dresses that make up my wardrobe, and which are worn out to nice meals, music events, theater, and for teaching and conferences were MUCH less expensive than the "designer" sweats and leggings I see my students wearing all the time. Anyone who has been to a Goodwill or Salvation Army quickly deduces that nicer clothes are actually easier to come by in thrift stores, because they have less wear before people tend to get tired of them and donate them. All of my nicest dresses have been Goodwill finds. Five dollars for a dress, vs. $50 for a pair of Victoria Secret sweats or leggings. It seems like a no-brainer.
On a personal note, one of the nicest things my boyfriend ever did for a gift was to take me to a very special restaurant that happened to have a dress code. Everyone was dressed to the nines (again, not expensively, just nicely) and it was a magical evening.


Thank you, Lillian, for showing us that this issue is not about money, but dignity and respect.

Sylvie L writes:

Hello Jennifer,
I have only known about you for a few weeks and I am already a big fan. Read your books, your blog [most of it, yes] and highly anticipating the next book, which I have pre-ordered. I am a Parisian and Madame Chic could have been ME, the way I was raised. It is so REFRESHING to find that I am not the only one feeling the way you are feeling about American society and the wrong trend it has adopted for a while now. I am part of a movement of women that are actually fighting back just like you are and love to read all these lovely comments from your admirers. You have brought back so much loveliness into my world. I want to say a bit MERCI. Looking forward to meeting you soon. A tres bientot j'espere.


Hi Sylvie, it's wonderful to hear this from a Parisian's perspective. Thank you for your comment!


Even if your comment wasn't featured in this week's section, please know that I have read it and value it. Thank you for being an integral part of this blog community.

Before we close, check out this very funny parody video called, Activewear, that many readers sent me last week. I think this is just perfect considering what we've been discussing!

Let us know what you think in the comment section about this week's post. And I will see you on Tuesday for the launch of Polish Your Poise with Madame Chic! Have a great rest of the weekend.

Jennifer x


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